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The Mall Is A Place That Is Hell On Earth
I recently took my daughter to the mall and it reminded me why I hate the mall. The hummingbird loves it so I endure it after taking a xanax. Not only is the drive 40 minutes away, and I hate driving,...
View ArticleBeing Four: The F*ck You Fours
If you’re still standing after four years of parenthood, or tilting over a little, congratulations. Break out the champagne! This is the fuck you fours. You should check your child’s head for 666. This...
View ArticleAssholes And The Dumbasses Who Love Them
The Kardashians – Years ago, I thought they were mildly entertaining but after seeing young girls aspire to be like the Kartrashian women, that’s some scary shit. These people have fans… what the fuck?...
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My Ongoing In Law Cycle Of Thoughts
My in-laws will be visiting in a little over two weeks and I’ve been trying to mentally prepare for them, especially now with our new house, they’ll be staying with us for four fucking days since...
View ArticleLast Night, I Woke Up From A Nightmare About Donald Trump Being Elected...
A few posts ago when I posted about being in disbelief over Trump becoming the president-elect, I received some Pro-Trump comments. I didn’t publish them because I want to piss off any fucking idiot...
View ArticleI’ll Just Pretend We Don’t Have A Government Right Now
Dear fellow earthlings, Please help us here in America. I’ve had to ban myself from watching any news because I have been having such high anxiety. It feels like the world is going to end. I feel like...
View ArticleI Thought I Was So Cool With My Cassette Player And Smurf Tape
When I was about 8 years-old, I was given a cassette player. It was during the height of smurf popularity in the 80’s and I was given a smurf tape that I played over and over and over again. Singing...
View ArticleHow Slow Can You Go?
I have a very active 8 year-old who can’t sit still for very long. I also found that 8 is the new 12 when it comes to attitude. Oh, man… the attitude is strong with this age. She runs circles around me...
View ArticleAn Ass As Big As A Hot Air Balloon
If you want honesty, talk to a kid. When my daughter wants more information about something that I just can’t find the words for, I tell her to ask her dad. A few years ago, my daughter took a picture...
View ArticleThe Chocolate Bunny Meltdown
I’m going through the phase of should I blog or should I just shut the fuck up? I’m sure most of you think shut the fuck up. But then something happened. As my daughter has gotten older, I want to...
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